The chairman of the World Health Organization’s AIDS meeting declared that male-dominated societies are a health threat across the planet. When masculinity is built around a violation imperative, when male identity claims a right to access and dominate…
Are facts less important than conversation starters?
I was raised to believe that one keeps their mouth closed until they had all the facts.
“It is better to remain silent at the risk of being thought a fool, than to talk and remove all doubt of it”
In…
A few comments hit me over the last week that has inspired this post. The first was something that occurred at my partner’s workplace, where a manager used a supposed near death experience in their past to justify their need to achieve and be a…
* the global game of chair reshuffling has finally stopped with the musical envelopes reset for another few months at least
* bank is still screwing around with paperwork, at this point they almost have enough paperwork to steal my identity … twice
* working on a tender at the moment, my head is fine … my patience with those who do not read the statement of requirements is not
* my daily curmudgeonly quota is being reached far sooner in the day than it used to … and far sooner than I thought was possible
* I’m of the opinion that if Douglas Adams was still around he’d agree with me that politicians should all be put on the second ship …
* While we are at it, lets throw in the members of PETA and Animals Australia too
* Do I get a prism account? I’m thinking it could be a great personal search engine
* Maybe we can get a benign, fascist, all-knowing, star-trekian computer NSA voice system as well? Maybe we can call it SIRIously?
Regardless of the flavour (i.e. racism, genderism, ageism, etc) it’s not always about the letter as it is about the spirit.
Or to put it another way, it’s not about WHAT was said/written so much as HOW it was meant.
By Lauren Rankin May 2013
Patriarchy doesn’t just privilege men over women, but privileges certain kinds of men and certain kinds of masculinity. White, heterosexual, cisgender men receive the most favor, but with that privilege, they are expected to perform a certain type of masculinity, one that is normalized as natural but is, instead, a performance based on societal norms.
That’s what I thought I was transcending with my sensitive masculinity infused with a feminist sensibility until in early 2012 it became patently obvious it didn’t work and I began my search to find out why.
Men are not the target; patriarchy is. Male feminists understand that no one is free until we are all free, and until we end the patriarchal oppression of women, men will suffer, too.
How is it possible to separate men from patriarchy if men get privilege and advantage to varying degrees over women who constitute an oppressed victim class at the bottom of a one directional power hierarchy? Considering privilege entails the expectation men perform a particular yet not specified masculinity, patriarchy is either bizarrely contradictory or poorly defined.
Men can be great feminist allies, but because of their privileged positions as men and because they cannot understand firsthand what patriarchal oppression feels like, it’s important for men to take a supportive role.
I thought men could be feminists if they used the qualifier male so what’s with the inconsistent terminology? Are men who are feminists in a subordinate or associate membership class or not feminists at all and just supporters who can identify as an ally?
Male feminists can play a vital role in educating other young men and showing solidarity with feminist women, but they need to understand that they are supportive allies, not headlining superstars.
Hugo Schwyzer and Michael Kimmel didn’t get the memo.
The feminist movement needs male allies, but we need male allies who listen, who trust us, who support us. We need male feminist allies who will challenge their friends and male social circles, who will defend us without sidelining us, and who will continue to call out sexism when they see it. “I’m proud to be part of a movement where women are at the forefront and [I get] to be the backup,” Kilstein says. And that is what being a male feminist ally is all about.
It is flattering knowing feminists want to keep men around for more than opening jars however I may be of little utility since I need to understand rather than implicitly trust ideas before supporting or defending their proponents.
I am congenitally curious, I play with ideas for fun and ask questions. I’m not and never was cut out to be a male feminist ally because that kind of macho male ideological enforcer role just doesn’t fit with my masculinity and propensity for independent thought.
I shall remain a non-ideological gender egalitarian.
Thanks Lyall, you’ve put into words some of my thoughts I have been struggling with in this space, and trying to explain that equalitarianism in the past has led me into some strange and angry conversations.
In the United States, it seems, corporations are people too, except when it suits them not to be. In this week’s Congressional brouhaha over Apple’s overseas tax-avoidance schemes, the chief solutions proffered have been either to give firms like Apple a one-time tax holiday so they can bring some of their cash back home, or else stop…
Boys will be boys … especially when drinking is involved. Mind you, I have also seen the same type of behaviour from a group of women in the same state of inebriation. Whilst not excusable, human nature is,well, primal, and that is not contained to meatmarket nightclubs.
That said, an aspect of people watching I have noticed, is that (imbibed nonsense aside) that people do fall in love with people who they click with. You’d be surprised how far a laugh, a chat and just the ability to really listen to what someone is saying actually makes that click happen over any primal based short term stupidity. Or maybe its only something that happens as we get older?
What I’m saying is - you might be surprised who you click with. Or something.
No wonder their previous purchases went under …
